Well, rest assured there are plenty of ‘experts’ who’ve got an answer to oh so generously share with you – phew! Only trouble is the bulk of the answers are highly dangerous, toxic tosh that should never have been allowed in print without a severe medical warning for the health of your happiness – ouch!
Why you’re having to search for an answer to ‘How to be Happy’
A good case in point…
In a recent psychological study*, the researchers came to the following conclusion:
“Our findings depict the unhappy but meaningful life as seriously involved in difficult undertakings. It was marked by ample worry, stress, argument, and anxiety…
one can also use our findings to depict the highly, happy but relatively meaningless life. People with such lives seem rather carefree, lacking in worries and anxieties…
these patterns suggest that happiness without meaning characterizes a relatively shallow, self -absorbed or even selfish life, in which things go well, needs and desires are easily satisfied, and difficult or taxing entanglements are avoided.”
Hmm.. you see society and bods like this decry happy people as shallow takers, living meaningless lives of no importance to themselves or society – read the whole report if you want to check this out – it’s too boring and depressing to reproduce here and the counter arguments to their poisonous blatherings really need their own bookshelf, so I’ll stick to the relevant point: you have been swindled to believe that personal happiness is selfish and instead you need a life of ‘meaning‘. And that means not avoiding difficult or ‘taxing entanglements’. Really, this is the key to why you’re struggling to know how to be happy which would otherwise be an automatic part of your natural repertoire in knowing how to charge life down for the incredible everything that could be on offer. Doubt me? Check out your local kindergarten – how many happy, podgy, sticky faces do you see seeking out difficult, taxing entanglements?
Happiness Rule for the Common Man No. 3
Happiness gets such a bad rap because swindlers hate what they don’t have
And any jackass who believes you need ‘meaning’ in your life to be happy doesn’t understand the concept of ‘happiness’.
Fact: You’ve been fooled into believing because you’d really like to be happy, would love to go after goals and dreams that make you personally ecstatic, you are a shallow, vacuous, ungiving, conflict-avoiding boil on the ass of society. Because after all, miserable ‘meaningful’ people help others more than happy ‘shallow’ people, right? Pah! If you’re feeling happy and someone asks you for a donation to some worthy cause, are you more likely to flip them the bird than reach into your pocket? If you’re unhappy, stressed or anxious, are you in exactly the right frame of mind to be selfless, altruistic? Bollocks you are!
It’s no wonder you’re asking how to be happy because your life doesn’t stand a chance of panning out the way you planned, or dreamed of while this insidious bile is rampant in your thoughts, conscious or unconscious . How can you have any hope of executing an amazing plan or even starting out on an idea for something that would make you happy when you measure it against this ‘life should be meaningful’ propaganda swishing round your head? Before your motivation can even put it’s hand up, you feel so guilty that you aren’t trying to change the bloody world, (and have a really crap time on the way) that you don’t even start.
So here’s the Global Feel Good Company’s take on how to be happy:
Those miserable buggers always looking for meaning in their lives are the originators of all the drama in the world in the first place, not those seeking personal happiness. Then, having cocked life up for the rest of us, the swindling swine turn around and have the cheek to tell us ‘happy, live-and-let live’ types that it’s our responsibility to clear up the catastrophe they created. They thrive on these shenanigans to keep their unhappy lives ‘meaningful’. And the really ironic and infinitely infuriating part is they are exactly the wretches who have plenty of mal-motivation to keep creating oceans of chaos.
So for us happy types who don’t want to screw up everyone else’s life because of some huge twisted ego-trip, to stay happy you need to realize despite all the lies you’ve been told in school, in literature, in films and a million other places those pursing meaning are not a boon to society, not paragons of virtue worthy of emulating. Think about it, psychopaths have plenty of ‘meaning’ in their lives – that’s why many of them occupy positions of power. And people telling you directly, or indirectly, that you should be seeking ‘meaning’ in your life at the expense of personal happiness need pickling in their own ascorbic nonsense.
What are your deep psychological insights or superficial ramblings on how to be happy? State your findings in the comments below.
Make sure you don’t miss anything – receive the latest blogs straight to your inbox!
*McGraw-Hill - Dictionary of Scientific & Technical Terms, 6E, Copyright © 2003 by The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. - Some Key Differences between a Happy Life and a Meaningful Life - Forthcoming in Journal of Positive Psychology - Roy F. Baumeister, Florida State University - Kathleen D. Vohs, University of Minnesota - Jennifer L. Aaker, Stanford University Emily N. Garbinsky, Stanford University